So I have this mental list of songs that sound like sex. I recognize this is not a common aural typology, but it’s a category I’ve had in my head for a long time, and it just makes instinctive sense to me. Songs that sound like sex are songs you’d score a love scene to if you were doing a movie. They’re songs you could theoretically get busy to. They’re just …. really sexy songs, irrespective of the lyrics – which are usually sexy, but not as sexy as the music. Songs that sound like sex are musically sexy, so much so that the words don’t really matter. Here are mine.
Beast of Burden by The Rolling Stones
This is my favorite Stones song, a fact over which my dad has been kind enough not to disown me. There is literally nothing about I don’t love about this song, from the opening solo riff to the not-really-verses to the loose, lazy drumming to the words, oh my god. This is like, Sunday afternoon in the sun first thing when you wake up sexytimes.
Breakdown by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Tom Petty apparently disables embedding on his songs, what a tool.
But seriously. This is the original sexy song. This is a hip-swiveling knee-bending song. That bass line, Tom Petty’s nasal growl, the mini-drum-splosions, it is literally the musical version of sexy. If sex transmuted into a song it would sound like this. This is late night angry half-drunken sexytimes. Maybe you don’t like the other person very much.
Don’t Forget Me by The Red Hot Chili Peppers
At this point you may have noticed that I am sucker for solo guitar openings without drums beneath them.
When I first heard this song, a movie played in my head. It is two people in a dark living room and it’s totally raining out and the light from the street lights is sort of shining on them through the rained-on window? You know the way I mean. And the chick is wearing a red dress and they’re dancing a very sexy hip-grindy way. That’s the kind of sexytimes this song sounds like. Late night passionate intense sexytimes, but not necessarily of the “I love you” variety. More of the “you’re really sexy” variety. Anyway this is the first song that I heard and went, “Wow, this sounds like sex. Wait, what?”
I Want You (She’s So Heavy) by The Beatles
This song is definitely half getting stoned in someone’s basement and half sexytimes. But perhaps it is the kind of sexytimes that happens after you get stoned in someone’s basement? I wouldn’t know, as I have never done that. But something about the slow thumpiness of the “I want you” sections gets me every time. The way it slips into Here Comes the Sun is not at all sexy, but is magical.